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Duck, Duck … Canadian Goose!

Duck, Duck … Canadian Goose!

It started with the sound of chirping birds on a peaceful morning in the Crystal Gardens subdivision in Avondale.

Suddenly the relative silence was broken by a single honk off in the distance. Followed by another, and then another … growing in frequency, intensity and volume over a several second span … heads turning, trying to determine what was causing the increasing noise, wondering from which direction the attack might come … and then they appeared, two Canadian geese flying no more than 20 feet above the ground after lifting off from the lake in search of, well, other water.

Sure, they may look positively ducky waddling harmlessly on the ground in search of bugs and water and such. But in the air, with their attack foils … er feathers … in position, rebel yell … er honk … echoing from their lips … er bills …

In the City of Surprise, real estate agents are required to disclose the presence of Luke Air Force Base to the south. Frequent F-16 flyovers aren’t just likely, they’re guaranteed.


After this morning I’m thinking there needs to be a similar notification map to warn homebuyers of the presence of Canadian geese – flying machines which soar at much lower altitudes and are more likely than an F-16 to unexpectedly drop its ordinance.*


* This is a representation of what a Canadian goose notification map might look like in Crystal Gardens and has no basis in fact, logic or necessity. In fact, this could be the stupidest idea I’ve had since trying to give a cat a bath back in 1991.

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